Saturday, June 26, 2010

She is mine and I will name her Red


Red is mine. M.I.N.E. No one is allowed to touch me. Period. Red keeps inviting people over and they insist on touching me. Some even have the audacity in attempting to pick me up. The horror of it all.

One afternoon Red had her brother over. I don't believe it was her brother. Who would have a brother that is accompanied by two boisterous children and a calm woman who smells like other cats. If that man has cats as he claims he should know you DO NOT scratch my butt without my permission AND you don't pick me up. I am a dignified young lady NOT some beauty to be pawed. *Scoffs* I let this young man know in no uncertain terms that his behavior was unacceptable. I did feel guilty when Red walked in after I hissed and yowled at this man. She was kind enough to reassure me that I was still a good girl and that her brother wasn't listening to me as he should.

Recently she had another guest over and she had the gaul to touch me! How dare she?! Red quickly stepped in to rescue me but it was so fast I couldn't see to clearly that it was Red. I might have hissed at her and for that I am very sorry.

Good people, please admire me and give me praise but don't touch me. Red only gets that priviledge.

Note from Red: This is totally unlike Hester. Perhaps it is my fault since I have a quiet life. Few people visit since we all have different schedules. When Hester is touched or someone attempts to pick her up she makes a distressing cry for help. Poor thing. She really scared my brother when she was picked up. She is just very beautiful so it isn't surprising that everyone wants to be with her.

Saturday, June 12, 2010

G'morning

Me: Yaaawwwnn. Man, I shouldn't have stayed up so late playing Plants vs. Zombies. Yaawwwn. I had (yawn) get the girls their breakfast. (Shuffles off to kitchen). I wonder *yawn* where the girls are? Hester is the first one up to let me know that the alarm hasn't gone off. Hmm. Oh, well. It gives me time *yawn* to wash their dishes, fix their meal and then mine. Oh, coffee sounds wonderful for this morning. YAAAWWWWN.
GAHHH!! JESUS, MARY, and JOSEPH! ENID!
Enid: Hey, there. Good morning Red. Don't worry about me. I already had breakfast. Oh, you might want to clean up the mess I left. Thanks.
Me: Enid, please don't give me any more heart attacks! AND STAY OUT OF THE CUPBOARDS IN THE MORNING.
Enid: Geez! No need to shout. Guess someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed, eh?
Hester: (from the top of the fridge) Can I have frozen kitten treats for breakfast?
Me: Sigh.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Sunday Story

Background information about the house: My house has three bedrooms, living room, kitchen, hallway and a bathroom. Now when they remodeled they made a "doorway" from the kitchen into the 3rd bedroom and removed the door to the 3rd bedroom. This give the house a lovely circular feel and makes the girls happy because they can chase each other around the house without the impediment of running into walls and doors. Still with me?!

The story: I returned home with packages in hand from work and from the store. No kittens to be found. HOWEVER I did find the yarn from my knitting. I became Theseus/Ariadne following the yarn around the house hoping to find the Minotaur AKA THE Kittens so I could kill them. SIX TIMES I followed the yarn around the circular pattern of the house and ending up in the bedroom under the bed where the kittens were grinning and giggling gleefully over their knitted prize...the beginnings of a wooly afghan.

Dratted cats.

Hester: Heeeheheeee. Let's do that again Enid!

Enid: YEAH! That was fun!

Health update: The girls had their belated vet visit and booster shots. As usually everyone cooed over them. However Enid let it be known that she was not a little kitten. She was a newly trapped cougar who would take anyone out if they tried to come close to her. I swear it was like seeing a National Geographic special on cougars. That was my angelic loving Enid. Hester even hissed twice which was shocking since she has sweetest disposition. Diagnosis for the girls was they are in excellent health. Diagnosis for my shirt - covered in cat hair and sporting a few rips after holding Enid back from attacking the vet and the technician.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Message from Enid

Why am I the one to leave the messages to the readers? (Whisperings in the background) Ah, too true. I am the most vocal in all things. Hey, Red could you get your fingers out of my water dish. The nerve of it all. I put that glitter ball in the water dish to get it clean and she goes in and messes it all up. Humans.

First of all, I am apologizing on behalf of Red. She hasn't posted as often as she should. Hmmm, in fact she hasn't been as attentive to us as well. Right, Hester. (Emphatic "Right" in the background). She has informed us that work has really kept her busy. At her place of employment she is holding down two full-time positions and is really looking forward to holding one position where she can really show what she can do and has been trained to do. Nevertheless, she has been diligently taking pictures of us. I think she believes we are still growing but I can assure you that we are not.

Hester here. Pfffff, not getting bigger my little gray nose! Enid's belly is getting bigger.
Enid: Is NOT!
Hester: Is too. You are the only one in the house that eats those icky fattening treats. Folks, they are just DISGUSTING! I never touch the stuff myself.
Enid: They are not disgusting. You eat those "Greenies" and any veggie Red tries to hide from you.
Hester: The proof will be in the pudding when you get weighed on Saturday.
Enid: NOT. Hiiiiiiii-yaaaaaah!
Hester: Oooommmph.
Red: Will you two cut it out I am trying to clean your bedroom! I don't want you wrastlin' in the dirt I just swept up.
E & H together: SHE STARTED IT!

Special note: Hester loves to run around the house with Enid chasing her but Enid doesn't always oblige. Stay tuned for Sunday's post (sans pictures). All my friends laughed their heads off when I told them this story.